It was Barry Potheads first day at Pigpimples School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and his first class was "Herbs and Potions".............


( I just know I'm gunna get some help with this one!)

Who was the writer of the story? I.M. Growling?

no, it's "us".

----For those that don't know, Barry Pothead is the second cousin once removed on his witch's side of Harry Potter. Pigpimples School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is sort of to Hogwarts School of Withcraft and Wizardry what a local community college is to Harvard.----

Barry walks into his first class and is greeted by Blunderdoor, the headmaster of Pigpimples.......................

.....and across the room Barry spots a pretty girl, the other end of her shining like the moon, the girl's name "Herheinie".......

(ok, who kidnapped agnes?)

barry looked on in astonishment and amazement at herheinie...

(agnes wasn't sure about where this was going) (and was sure we would get back to it later)

barry reached into his cloak to check for his pouch of required items and remembered how as a small boy at his father's amusement he had been inspired to gather together a bundle of some of his most prized things to carry around with him.
"what you got there?"
no one had ever shown interest in the bundle before, so persueded, barry began showing his dad the assorted things, a few bits of colored cellophane, one giant green sequin, some crackerjacks toys, and a bouncing marble.
his dad chuckled and would always refer to it as his medicine bundle.
anyhow, it was the first day of school and barry had gotten in on a scholarship.

the classroom was "decorated" with some things that would right away catch barry's eye, a few gazing balls, one purple, one green, one amber. suspended from the ceiling were mobiles of various themes that seemed to move in a steady fluid rotation, a giant piece of lens quartz set on an easel, and giant windows, ample frames to the rolling hills outside...

Barry was still standing in the doorway to the classroom, when suddenly a red-haired boy bumped into him, tumbling them both to the floor.

"I'm sorry - I'm always bumping into things... My name is Rum Queasy."

To which Barry replied, "I'm not a thing - I'm a person!"

Sorry Lar, haven't read any of the books and fell asleep during the first movie.

i don't know the stories either, (i am only just vaguely familiar generally)

does it look like i know what i'm talking about??

As barry sat down at a desk he realized that his medicine bundle was radiating heat. He tore open his cloak and stuffed the now glowing bundle into his desk. He knew at once he had gotten the bouncing marble and giant green sequin too close together. He desperately hoped professor squirrel did not notice the smoke seeping from his desk.

but it was too late. the inside of a desk being the perfect circumstance for a smouldering medicine bundle...

and the smoke rolled out...and up...and around,,,and around and everybody got up and sat down...on the ground...on the ground...and the green grass was all around...and in gold and in browns...and in reds all around...

and Blunderdoor instructed all the students to breath in deeply ! whislt doing so Barry contemplated the beauty of Herheine !

....as the smoke continued to dance around the room, a giant pink bull frog slithered out of the smoke dressed in wings and a tutu. Within seconds later the pink bull frog turned into Groaning Myrtle who reeked of beer with her eyes dilated and gave a big gas burp. When Myrtle burped she turned into a turtle in a girdle and all of the students heads spun around and an explosion of pea soup came from their mouths in gallons.

Visions of the beautiful Herheine continued to dance in Barry's head (Hey what was that red haired boy doing in his vision!?!?). He began to float through the sea of green pea soup, people would later say that he was actually sitting on a surf board to keep afloat. The medicine bundle was happily humming a swashbuckling pirate song, it was thinking of the cracker jack toys it contained.

Myrtle wailed mornfully, swooping through the hallways of the school (we all know this was caused from wearing a girdle). She struggled and struggled, but her short little legs would not allow her to remove the offending garment! Such is the life of a ghost turtle.

barry offered the students each "a doobie for the stomach's sake" and looking to the turtle, "i have never seen a turtle in such a predicament..."