It was a dark and blustery night...

Bobby Dylweed trudged through the mud and the rain. He had nothing except the clothes on his back and his guitar. It seemed his journey was endless. He'd sleep at the Y, maybe work at the gas station for extra money, but he always had to be on his way. He was in Louisiana now, and kept heading eastward. He had to go north and east to New York City, because of the telegram Morning Woody sent him. Bobby had no idea why Woody wanted to see him, but the message said it was urgent.
Exhausted, Bobby sat down on the curb. He had been hitchhiking all day. When nobody picked him up, he just walked. It was evening. Bobby looked across the horizon and saw lights and heard festive music. He was near New Orleans and it was Mardi Gras!
His spirits lifted, Bobby skipped down the hill to check out the party.

At the party was a shy but friendly folksinger named Arlo G. who would later be famed for being arrested for littering.

Arlo was standing around his guitar across his back watching the whole scene wearing his black suit & his brown fedora hat. Red socks complete the ensemble. (It was an outfit he'd be wearing well into his 50's.) He didn't seem to notice Bobby. He was too busy sitting to himself. He wasn't a big party type. He had come to town to sing in a local club & after having done his gig thought he'd go & see what all the excitment that was happening in the town was.

Meanwhile Bobby continued walking down the hill...

It wasn't long before Bobby D. arrived at the party and crossed paths with Arlo G. Although Arlo had never met him before, he knew as if by instinct that he had better stay on the "upstream" side of Dyllweed, being aware of the folk-song writing process and all. "That's a right fancy ukelele you're totin' there, fella," Arlo said. "Hear any good tunes lately"?

"Why, funny you should ask," mumbled Dyllweed, nasally (barely audible above the bluster outside). He motioned with his hand to a couple dressed in in rhinestone and sequined suits. As they stepped forward, Dyllweed whispered, "Meet Marvin and Mavis Smiley."

"Howdy!" yodeled Mavis, as Marvin smiled an electric smile. "What would you like to hear, Dyll?"

"Anything, just sing," he grumped, as Marvin pulled the guitar from his back, and began to strum. As the Smileys shared their Bluegrass rendition of Three Coins in a Fountain,

Slightly bemused and altogether round and out Dyll and Arlo were taken aback and afront at Mavis and Marvin's virtuosity. Seeing that they had made an impacted tooth with all the fillings, Mavis winked at Marvin and they launched into a rousing hillbilly/C&W/bluegrass uptempo version of Kum By Yah (all 23 verses too) which, by the end B and A were nearly rolling on the ground laughing.

Talk about spirits being lifted (there's just not enough space). With smiles as sparklely as the rhinestones on their clothes and a musical delivery as smart as any 12 year old with $20 and a years supply of Skittles, Mavis and Marvin worked their particular kind of magic and, in the cool of that Mardi Gras evening, inspired both Bobby and Arlo in a way that could only be drescribed as average.

BUT (and that's a big butt too) the celebration had taken on larger proportions and indeed beckoned...

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Message edited by Ron on Apr 14, 2000 @ 08:50 PM ---</FONT></center>

Sensing that Bobby and Arlo were about to leave, Marvin cleared his throat and spoke, "Are you boys musicians by any chance? I noticed the guitar and and the calloused fingers."

"Umm, yeah I am, but I can't speak for Bobby here though I figure he must be since he has the undeniable residue of guitar dust about his person."

"Well, I was wonderin'..., " spoke Marvin, making a sideways glance towards Mavis who smiled that same smile they had smiled while performing. (You know one of those smiles that's not trying to sell you something, but the kind of facial contortion that happens when good friends meet and are having the most pleasant of times.)"...if you'd like to look at a song I'm workin' on. I've just got a few lines and I was wonderin' if you'd give me an opinion on them."

"Sure, I wouldn't mind taking a look at 'em!" enthused Bobby, definately up from being down.

"Yeah, whip 'em out Marvin. We'll take a gander," diffused Arlo.

"Here goes," coughed Marvin. "Like a blind cloned cowboy, Tryin' to find him a source for a new fangled radio. Like a cornpone plowboy, wrapped in chains and fetters with just more than a month to go, gettin' 'bout ready to blow... Well, whaddya think?"

Arlo scratched his head and pondered for a bit, seeming reluctant to comment right away. Bobby just rubbed the back of his neck over and over like you see people do who aren't really comfortable with the situation they're in or the goods someone is trying to sell them. Marvin waited nervously with expectation while the sounds of Mardi Gras beckoned even more insistently. Would Arlo and Booby comment, would Marvin's feeling be hurt, would Mavis ever stop smiling that smile? For the answer to these and other questions (What time you gettin' up?) tune in later when you'll hear Arlo say, "Was that a Cmaj7 chord you were a'playin' there Marvin?" ...

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Message edited by Ron on Apr 22, 2000 @ 10:34 AM ---</FONT></center>

"Wait a minute Arlo, how old are you?" Bobby asked.
"13" he answered. "Dude, I do as I please. I'm an independant spirit. Wow, look at those tits!" A buxom topless beauty winked and walked by in their direction.
"Why are you blushing so much Bobby?" asked Mavis as she undid her bra. "God made our bodies to be seen."
"That was a good song Marvin. I hope that I shall be able to write one that's as good someday" said Bobby.
"So what does Arlo Guthrie think?" asked Mavis.
Bobby dropped his guitar in astonishment.
"Guthrie. . ?" Bobby turned at little Arlo in amazement, "You're Arlo GUTHRIE???"
"Yeah, so?"
"Is Morning Woody your father?" Bobby was totally impressed.
"Dude, I'm sick of people asking me that." Arlo eyed Bobby up and down "If I didn't know better you're dressed up as my dad for Mardi Gras." Arlo took out a cigarette and struck a match from his boot heel. "What's with that dopey hat, anyway?"

Bobby took off his hat and blushed even more.
"Arlo, let's go to Bourbon Street. I've always wanted to go there. Maybe there's some blues or jazz clubs we can check out."
"We can't do that" answered Arlo. "They don't let white people in there."
"That's ridiculous" said Bobby. "Why would anyone care what color we were?"
"Hey, go ahead and try, see what happens. Wait a minute." Arlo squinted his eyes really hard and seemed to stare through Bobby's soul. "Bobby Dylweed. Now THAT name sounds familiar. I know why my dad wanted to see you!"
"OMIGOD!!! Tell me, is he alright? Why did he send me a telegram? What do you know about it?" Bobby asked frantically.
"Relax dude. And quit breathing all over me. We're brothers."
"What?"
"Well, half brothers anyway. My dad was a spy in World War II. He pretended to be a rich count and took the Duchess of Windsor to bed. After the fascist witch told him when Germany would invade Stalingrad, he revealed his true identity and left. Oh yeah, nine months later Wallis had you." explained Arlo.

...the sparkly, not to mention, well embroidered singing couple alternating between a permanent smile and expressionless as a fever of excitement seemed to overtake them, had fallen speechless over the conversation and both seemed increasingly far away. in fact they had fallen so very silent that arlo and bobby began to wonder if they had been looking upon two stuffed figures...brought to life only by their imaginations. as marvin and mavis stood looking more and more like a matching set of jack-o'-lanterns, bobby and arlo found themselves embraced by a sense of surrealism as the spells of mardi gras swirled around them. cocooned in the presence of one another, they wandered off into the night air until they could regain a better sense of reality...

......and as sure as night follows day, reality descended on bobby and arlo in the form of dozens, no, hundreds of blue uniformed members of New Orleans' Finest, some on horseback, some in patrol cars, some on foot, but all wearing the crescent badge signifying that they were members of the N.O.P.D. "You mean this here mardi gras thing is over?", asked arlo to no one in particular. One of the policemen replied, "That's right, kid, and we're lookin' for somebody with some garbage pick-up experience to give us a hand with this mess. What about you and your friend, there?"

"Hey, man, me and my buddy here were just getting ready to take off. No hassles, ya dig?" Arlo flashed a peace sign at the officers, prodded Bobby with his guitar case and began to walk off, humming quietly to himself. The officers mumbled something about long-haired pinko white trash, turned on their trusty steeds and road off into the sunset.
Bobby followed, awed by Arlo's graceful handling of a potentially perilous situation. "Hey, that was close, man. Thanks for getting us outta that," he said to Arlo. "Yeah, man" Arlo responded.
Dusk was turning to dark as the pair trudged along the road to nowhere. They had been walking in the same direction for nigh on two hours and hadn't come across another living soul. Bobby was hungover from the night before and hungry, to boot, he needed a few minutes to get himself in order. "Let's rest awhile, man" he suggested. "Cool" said Arlo.
Bobby picked a grassy area on the side of the road (not to be confused with the side of the side road) and stretched out. Arlo took his guitar out of its case, closed the case so as to have something to sit upon and proceeded to strum a few chords.
"Hey, Arlo, that guitar playing you do is really cool, but you know, any good musician worth his weight in salt should play banjo. By the way, have you ever seen the movie Deliverance?"

"Sure, I saw it; only I bet you didn't know that the 'Dueling Banjos' idea really got started as a 'Dueling Ukuleles'idea. If we only had a couple of ukes right now, I could show you what I mean." Just then,......

...just then,,,who was it? arnie, it was arnie...arnie came whizzing around the corner in a tractor, no wait a minute, it was todd, that's right, todd, no, it was both todd and arnie come whizzing by on a runaway suburban tractor (remember that?) actually it was stolen, yeah...and they were...actually there was a bench involved...but not now...the bench is missing, but they had a hay-wagon full of folks, cuz they were having a hay-ride, some of them fell off (that happens sometimes ya know, but they were o.k.) but there were some left who didn't fall off and a few of them had ukuleles...what a stroke of genius! (or something like that)

Up in the sky Bobby and Arlo saw an airplane flying by. They pointed at it and watched for a bit, but then all of a sudden the jet crashed. Bobby grabbed Arlo and yelled "C'mon, let's go see if the pilot is alright!"

So Bobby and Arlo ran to the scene of the wreck. Flames were flying from the shattered pieces. Bobby scrambled to the cockpit and lifted the lid.

"Are you alright!?" he screamed at the pilot.
"I think he's breathing." said Arlo.
"C'mon here", said Bobby and he grabbed the pilot around his waist and dragged him out.

"WOO HOO!!! That was a real E RIDE!! That was totally awesome!!! It was dynamite!!!! It was like, FAR OUT!!!!!!!!!" the pilot squealed as Bobby carried him out of the wreckage to safety. The pilot was a blond man in his twenties who couldn't seem to stop giggling.

"Hey, you almost got yourself killed doing that." chastised Bobby. "What were you thinking?"

"Oh, gee, I'm sorry, that *was* real stupid of me. It's just that as I was flying, I lost my glasses and I was like totally blind and I lost control! Ah, here they are!" He searched through the debris and picked up a pair of old-fashioned metal rimmed glasses that were a bit scuffed. As he put them back on he said "Yeah, now I can see you better! I'm Johnny Deutchendork! Pleased to meet you!"
Bobby shook hands and said "I'm Bobby Dylweed and my friend here is Arlo Guthrie" Bobby gestured toward Arlo, who was trying very hard not to laugh at Johnny.

Johnny noticed Bobby's guitar and asked him if he played it.

"Yes, do you want to hear a song I wrote?" Bobby answered. Johnny said he did, so Bobby started to sing in a nasal croak and play:

How many roads must a man walk down
Before you call him a man
How many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand
How man times must the cannonballs fly
Before they're forever banned
The answer my friend, is blowin in the wind
The answer is blowin in the wind

"No, no, no! You've got it all wrong!" Johnny got up and snatched Bobby's guitar away. "It goes like THIS" and he proceeded to play and sing in a soaring tenor:

How many years can a mountain exist
Before it's washed to the sea
How many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free
How many times can a man turn his head
Pretending he just doesn't see
The answer my friend, is blowin in the wind
The answer is blowin in the wind

Bobby was stunned.

..."hmmm, there's something vaguely familiar going on here...in a sort of quantum fracture kinda way..." beheld arlo unexpectedly. "yeah..." noted bobby "sorta like deja vu only...different." suddenly they recognized a curious sense of possibility as they stared off endlessly (much like 2 fish in an aquarium) into the realms of wonder....