Hello, I am new to the Group W Bench. I was disoriented one day and cruising the net and landed on Arlonet. A rant entitled political election (at least that is what I thought I called it) popped out and I hit submit. It invoked a reaction, I was unanimously (and in six maybe seven part harmony) sent to the Group W Bench. Well, here I am!!!!

As an introduction, let me offer this story:

As a card carrying member of corporate America, I am entitled to at least one review a year, the ritual of pitting the individual against the corporate ideal in a philosophical squabble on the quality and value of servitude.

I entered the room. The first awkward moment passed slowly as two pawns in their game faced each other across the table. He stammered; let’s start with the good things. His words had no meaning as my eyes fell immediately to the bottom line, the development plan! I was out of control (it said). I failed to act per corporate guidelines in the eyes of those in the know. I immediately stopped the jabber in mid-praise and said I disagree with this part here, pointing to the words on the page. A forty minute debate began in which, in my mind, I outwitted him with daring arguments that smashed his barriers and filled him with my perspective.

Finally I said, it comes down to this, you have no issues at all with what I have done and in fact you have gone over the edge at points describing how well I did it, so what is the problem? He responded, “It is not what you do it is how you do it, you just don’t conform to the corporate system”.

I fell back in my chair, took a deep breath and tried to hold back the tears. I had never felt so truly successful before in my entire life. I have dedicated myself to a non-conformist philosophy and in this struggle with the deity who wishes to possess my very soul as well as my fiscal future (its trump card in the days ahead), their minion and pawn admitted defeat on my battleground!

A small victory for so many words and I will try to avoid such long winded rants in the future. I just hope conformity is not a requirement on the Group W Bench. Maybe others out there live in the haze of corporate indigo?

In my final year in law school, I had an interview with a national accounting firm, & I realized immediately that I wouldn't fit the corporate ideal, either. They sent a 5-man panel of interviewers, which shocked me. They all wore gray suits & glasses with the same type of frame.

I entered & said, "Had I known this, I woulda brought several people myself!"

The humor went right over their head. I saw 10 pieces of glass staring at me.

Welcome--glad you found your way here!

I'm the corporate wierdo, absolutely. But on Wednesday morning, they'll give me a pat on the back & will take my photo with the CEO, for surviving 25 years there. It helps that I'm in the 'creative' division; we do the publishing & AV & Web stuff, so I'm not the ONLY company freak, but we are few. It's been a rocky road, and I've spent plenty of time 'on the carpet.' But I've done some good there when they weren't looking (in literature for children & youth). I guess that makes it worthwhile. But I'm ready to get the hell out of Dodge. Sigh...someday!

Welcome!

And please DON'T stop your extensive posting... I agree with much of what you have said... I'm glad you're here and hope to see many more writings from you!

Welcome PSBeaty! I still contend that my whoa was a good whoa. As I recall there is a conformity requirement on the Group W Bench. You have to have at least created a nusince (or something much worse) to be accepted. You fit right in. Have fun filling out the forms and playing with the pencils.

Gus

See why I love it here! I've been on the carpet a few times myself as part of a large corperation and now as part of a smallish business run by three members of a family. But I know my rights and the law and always kept up on polices and my work could not be faulted so Ive never been fired but have been made to suffer in childish ways. And all because I was standing up for other people in my charge(senior citizens with Dementia),and other co-workers, and in my present job, the anti sexism laws which were fought for and won here 20 years ago! (yup the dinasours are still around)
So great to know your all out there!

To Avoid being called on the carpet, work in a place with wood floors. But, if you do get called, take a lesson from John Belushi in "Animal House" when he got called into the Dean's office. Stand there with pencils in your nose, look inocent, and pretend to listen intently. In the remote chance that this doesn't work.......sing a bar or two of "Alice".

This has been a public service announcement.
<FONT size="1">( I am not Joe Bloggs , but I still approved this post)</FONT s>

I find humor in your comments. I don’t know how many of you realize this but there is no reality in the corporate world. Its all imaginary, its gotta be. I drive to work listening to the oldies station on the radio, watching nature go by, minding my own business, trying to distance myself from the reality I will soon be facing. It is a dream I walk into every day. It’s like there is a corporate deity that needs a Bible written and he has chosen me as his Job. His dark side says to himself “what situation can I create for poor old PSBeaty today.” Then he sits in front of his high definition deity screen drinking sacred brew and watching a real life situation comedy. I spend my days reacting to these crazy situations for his pleasure. I walk around in amazement trying to make the best of the situation but everyone in my dream is taking everything so serious and they don’t understand my need for levity to make sense of it all. I walk away numb at the end of the day hoping he is taping these things so I may receive some residuals someday and get on to the good life that I know is gonna come. I have a couple of situations to share if there is any interest but now it is time for trials and tribulations.
Later!

PS: Of course! If it were not for the daily Comedy Channel at work, I coudn't have stayed. There's a reason the tragedy mask and the comedy mask are on the same head. I've made a habit over the years of constructing mental 'ethnologies" or 'animal behavior studies' (from my years in Anthro) about the various groups at work. My division, for instance, definitely is headed by a silverback...

So, rip out the stories when you can. Would love to hear (read) them!

<FONT size="1">Edited to say: Terrie e-'d me to ask what a silverback is. Sorry if I was obtuse. It's the dominant male in a mountain gorilla troop. Soon after a gorilla achieves that position, he develops a streak of silver hair along his spine. Everywhere I look around at work, there are old white guys with silver hair and dark suits. I mean, that building has way more than its fair share of them--you can't imagine! And their behavior so much resembles the silverbacks' behavior--it's uncanny!</FONT s>

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 1 times, lastly by Ceashel on Nov 06, 2004 ---</FONT></center>

One of my thinking workmates and I were just discussing these very issues this afternoon at work. I likened it to going through a time warp when we drive through the gate. I am a self taught student of socialology and gender studies etc so have many lab rats to observe in my work environment. Their nice enough people but the politics are a constant source of interest to me. In minor ways I play along and can mostly predict the outcome and keep peace but there is a line and if anyone steps over it I speak up for myself assertively and so far this has done me no harm because I know my rights and I also let people know that I know when they are SNOWING me. Enough raving its Fri night here and I'm beat.

But, Joe,...What did they say? Did you get the job?

Didn't get the job, Gerry, which is fine. When I was single, it seemed like the thing to do was to go with a national firm. Now 20 years of marriage & 3 kids later, things couldn't have worked out better for me. I'm with a 15-person accounting firm & 2 of the 3 principals were city street kids growing up, just like I was, so I'm comfortable there. I work mostly with small businesses & nonprofits.

(Edited to add the last sentence.)

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 1 times, lastly by P. Pittsburgh Joe on Nov 06, 2004 ---</FONT></center>

I feel diversity bubbling up from deep inside! The pressure is building as I review the Corporate Diversity Statement. I feel a rant coming on that will breakthrough all my stereotypes. Anyone else feel the diversity?

I do. I figure I'm about as diverse as it gets at my office. And I'm waiting very impatiently for Blunderites to be featured on the cafeteria bulletin board and in the monthly e-newsletter that no one reads.

We're thinking alike again Chel!! I declare! I'm getting so sick of childish politics at work. I was just discussing this with one of the more mature people at work, (and she's only 24!!)you know, one of those people you can talk to without playing mind games?? Don't get me started!! You guys really keep me sane!! Thanks!!