Not a problem here, gwen. We talked in blat for quite awhile like our normal old selves, even though my post had aggravated you, and I had read and responded to your post. I don't think a truce is needed, it's kind of implied?

LMAO @ Dave and Sherry...

<FONT size="4">DAMN!</FONT s> I thought I was gunna get to promote another cage match!

In fairness to Cheryl, I have met her and when we met she tried very hard to be friendly and helpful, I do feel that as a person she is NOT trying to be nasty, it just comes off that way.

Also I noticed that she has a fixed focus and can only see one thing at a time and with rose colored glasses on even that can be blurred.

I do not support her nor excuse her for posts which reflect badly upon either Dave or the site, nor for that matter do I desire for her to keep posting as she has done so many times in the past, so in having said all that may I offer Cheryl a great big hug and then tell her to fuck off?

edited to insert the word NOT, this was a typo and I do wish to coorrect, sorry Cheryl, I should have read my post more carefully...really need a proof reader

<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 2 times, lastly by Nathen on Mar 15, 2001 ---</FONT></center>

When I wrote what I wrote I honestly had no idea it would upset anyone & if I had known believe me I wouldn't have written it. Sometimes folks will get pissed off or upset at something I've said & I honestly had no idea it was gonna upset them until after it was said or done. On here I have really tried hard to watch & make sure that what I wrote wouldn't be anything that would upset anyone as I could tell that folks get upset really easily & misunderstand. I'm now having to watch even more closely than ever. I had no idea what other folks were going to post in respose to me on the other site. Unfortunately I can't control what other folks write on there. When making the reference about the Lent thing, that was not diected at Starchild but at the idea itself. I was in the middle of a very frustrating experience & just had to vent & it wasn't directed at any person, only at the thing that was frustrating me. If you were in my shoes & folks were trying to force you into doing something you didn't want to do, I'm sure you'd be frustrated. I just got pushed a little too far LOL! So I won't venting on other sites since that seems to upset folks.

Today I read on here some stuff about me that was alot more hurtful than anything I have ever written. I really love this site & enjoy being here. This site is the main reason why I wanted to get on the internet. In 1998 before I was able to get an internet computer the library started having the internet & I was going to the library every week to be able to do this site & was so happy when I finally got an internet computer & could get on everyday at home. I want to make it clear that I have nothing against Dave or anyone else here. Believe me if I was going to write anything hateful about someone I would use their anme & it would be really hateful sounding.

If folks have hatred against other blunderites, I sure don't want to be involved in it. I just want to like everyone & be friendly with everyone. I just want to be nice to others & hope they want to be nice too. I don't need any therapy LOL! Treating me with kindness is the best threrapy I could ever have. So I'm hoping this will soon be over & this topic soon closed or changed to something jokey so we can all put this behind & go back to normal around here. So I wish you all a peaceful day! Let's all take the time to spread love & peace. I know I want to.

we all now know the sound of collective foreheads running smack into a wall...

Sung to the tune of "Row, row ,row your boat"

Blah blah blah blah blah yadda yadda yadda

bork bork bark bork bark yadda yadda yadda.........

LOL!!!!

Arnie, you don't have to worry about YOUR head, you're the Backhalf!!

Let's put this in more simple terms. First of all, for all the differences, I don't think that actual hatred is involved. Feuding, yes, but hatred is a pretty strong word even so. I don't think I hate anyone (well, except for Ralph Nader. I really, really hate him, but that's off-topic).

Cheryl, it's just a simple matter of cause and effect. If someone says they don't like it if you do something, well, that doesn't mean you can't do it. But it does mean that you know how the person feels about it and shouldn't be surprised when there's a reaction to it. When it goes on over a long period of time, the reaction is going to build. Basically, if someone feels strongly enough, as Dave has in the past, to ask you not to do something, well, that someone is just going to get more and more pissed if you continue to do it. Then it's your choice...exercise your freedom to do what you want and deal with the reaction or modify your behavior.
That's the freedom we all have in everything we do. We don't have the freedom to insist that everyone accept our actions, or even accept our intentions. How people react to us falls in the area of their freedom of thought.

*covers ears, averts eyes*

LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Dave:

Once the votes are tallied, the person will have to leave the island immediately. And the next one voted off the island is....

(Sorry to rip Sherry off on this one - but it was just so funny)." <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No Way are we going to allow another hanging chad election, how about a bribe to the webmaster?

edited to correct the quote thingy



<center><FONT COLOR="#000080">--- Edited 1 times, lastly by Nathen on Mar 15, 2001 ---</FONT></center>

Dunno if I am going to say this right, or not... but it is sincere!

I have all ready said that I never frequented Brineland until I wanted to find out the "truth of the matter" in that li'l issue, a (coupla?) weeks ago. And, I did see some small minded posts on those boards about that issue and the people on this site.

But...

When I started to consider it, I realized that those posts are not from many people. I mean, maybe a total of 4 people posted to that issue, and I'd have to say only 1 or 2 really were vitriolic about it - 1 of them consistantly so (which didn't surprise me, given the "reception" I'd received when I met this person at the church - before she even knew who I was).

My gut feeling is that maybe there are a lot of people in Brineland who don't agree with Cheryl, and who are like a lot of the people here - they don't think that Cheryl has the (fill in some word here - ability, courtesy, desire -) to change. Unfortunately, really negative opinions from just a couple of people seem to be speaking for everyone who posts to the board... and I'm sorry I didn't "get" that earlier.

Maybe I am wrong in this, but my feeling is that there are a lot of people who read (and probably post to) that board, who don't think about this site in a negative (though maybe not positive!) way, who have nothing against the people who post here, and who are enjoying Cherylgate. I should not have assumed that their silence meant that they agreed with the nastier posts - any more than I assume that the people who are not posting to the issue here enjoy reading the ramblings of Cheryl.

(My socks are grey.)

And now, back to the fun!

First, let me firmly mount my "foam brick wall" in front of me, so I won't hurt myself as I post.....

As Pat said, no one here is trying to be hateful to you Cheryl, per se. What you are seeing is a whole lot of frustration. It really would be a whole lot easier to just tell you off for stuff than try to explain to you what the problem is. And from what I've seen, pretty much everyone is still trying to explain the problem.......

See, I can't even count the number of times we've heard from you...oh, I didn't mean to piss anyone off, everyone takes what I say the wrong way. That excuse is perfectly acceptable - the first time it is used. It is even acceptable for a while after that, if it is not very often. Or if there is evidence that the person giving that excuse really didn't know she was pushing buttons.

But there are two problems with that excuse for you at this point, Cheryl. First of all, it happens a lot. See, when someone tells you that's what you're doing - saying things that are insulting to someone - and you say "I didn't mean it that way" and then continue to say the same things, people have no choice but to think you really do mean to insult, no matter how much you claim you didn't. Add to that the fact that you really aren't claiming you didn't mean to insult anyone - you are claiming the fault is with everyone else....that they should somehow just magically know that you never direct insults at anyone else, regardless of what your words say. There's a saying that goes "if it looks, smells, and acts like a dog, chances are pretty good it's a dog." Many of the things you write look, smell, and sound like insults - so everyone figures chances are pretty good that they are.

The second problem is......you have been posting things that seem pretty insulting to many of us around here, but some of the most insulting things you've said, you don't say here - you go and post them on another site where a few people very clearly do not like the people you are insulting. That makes everyone even more sure that you did intend them as insults - they are things you would never have posted on this site, and we all know it. So it looks very much like you are going to another group, where there are already some hard feelings, and purposely stirring up even more between the two groups. THAT is when you start getting your worst reactions from people around here. Because no matter how much you claim you don't like the fighting and arguing, the fact that you take any issues going on over here and whine about them to that other group, which definately WILL cause more hard words and feelings between the two groups, makes it look like you enjoy stirring up trouble, which pisses people off more than what you've actually said. I think most people here have decided that you enjoy stirring that other group up and getting them to complain further about certain people here - you get them to insult people here for you. You would have a very difficult time convincing me you don't enjoy stirring these things up at this point - just saying that you don't mean to do that isn't enough to convince anyone, they won't believe you. You will have to show you mean it BY NOT DOING IT ANYMORE! And even then, it will probably take a long time before people would trust that you aren't going to do it anymore. It doesn't mean you can't talk to those people - no one here would eever want to tell you who you can or can't talk to or be friends with. It just means you don't throw gas on a fire - and that's what you have been doing when you go over there with things you don't like over here. If you have a problem here, deal with the person you have a problem with.

Which brings up another point in all this. If you really were that frustrated and really, really wanted the blahs and the borks to stop, why did you never, not even once, e-mail Dave to explain to him, in PRIVATE!!!!!, why this was such a problem for you? Instead, you started complaining to other people, IN PUBLIC, about it. Not only other people, but other people who you knew don't like the person you were complaining about. All of those actions do not look like the actions of someone who wanted to fix a problem. They look like the actions of someone who was trying to stir up trouble.

If you really don't mean to insult people or piss people off, then here is a clue......think about what you are saying before you actually post it. Think about how you would feel if someone else said those things to or about you. Think about how you would feel if someone said those things about you to people you know don't like you and will start saying even more bad things about you because of it. In other words, before you post something, put yourself in the other person's shoes for a while, and see if you like the way it feels.

I think this really is about it for me. Up until now, I have kept trying to explain this to you in every different way I know how. Why? Because I have still thought, up to this, that somewhere deep down, you may not realize that the stuff you've said would end up causing as much problem as it has. I've still given you benefit of the doubt that you thought it would just be funny to people you were talking to, and wouldn't cause problems with anyone really. But at this point, I'm really beginning not to think that anymore. Since you just keep doing it, I don't have much choice but to think you enjoy stirring up problems. And posting here that isn't what you meant at all will not make me or anyone else think otherwise...in fact, it would probably just make people madder and more frustrated, since it makes it seem as if you are unwilling to take any responsibility for the words you've said. About the only thing that could help things now would be if you said you were sorry and you'll try to at least think about what you are saying and where you are saying it. And I'm telling you plainly - if anything you say says anything about not having any idea you would piss anyone off, or people not understanding what you meant, or anything like that, people will only get more frustrated and upset with you.

"What we have here, is a failure to communicate"(from the Sound track of a Paul Newman Movie)...

****Probly better known for the intro on 'Guns and Roses' CIVIL WAR..****

kim, would you please explain all this to
me one more time? but, slower
and a little more detailed?

Blah, blah, blah blah blah blablah, blah blah blah blah blah blah.....bork! bork! BORK BORK BORK BORK BORK!!!!!!!!!

Blah, blah, Borkbork!!!!!!

cool! now i understand.